DOWN TO EARTH

Successful relationships are not magic. Any marriage that will last a life time must have God at the centre and face REALITY -hard reality.

No matter whose voice you heard brother, if that lady insults you, disgrace you and would not respect you in front of your friends and family, your marriage will end in the dustbin. Bottom line, NEVER marry a lady who DISRESPECTS you.

What some people call love is just overwhelming emotion, infatuation or pure lust and they rush to the alter because they do not want to commit fornication or have a child out of wedlock only to realise just few months after the wedding they have made the greatest mistake of their lives.

You cannot force anybody to respect you. Not everyone admire who you are or what you do. It is your responsibility to look for a woman who naturally respect you and value your words.

I've seen wives who treat their husbands like trash while the secretary admires and adores him. He should have married the secretary in the first place while the woman go for a man she could really respect, look upto, honour and value, this is very important and basic but it's a pity some people don't get it till it is too late.

The desperation to get married overrode the need for wisdom and common sense.

I had turned proposals down on the spot without even praying about it. The guys were everything I did not want to get married to. One was a hyper jealous coward while the spoken English of another one turned me off. The third one appeared too desperate and pushy. All the other men who came to me were just a pure waste of my precious time and energy. Marriage to any one of them would have been a great disaster. I could NEVER submit to any of them.

My husband is a different ball game entirely. He had held me spell bound even before he proposed. I admire, love and respect him so much, he's someone I really want to be like. He has that natural influence on me and I submit to him because I do not want to hurt him.

Please don't force yourself on any lady. Don't marry to change her, you can't change anybody. A friend once told me he would force his fiancee to obey him. Several years into marriage now, he is biting his fingers in regret.

Don't let that happen to you. Open your eyes and make a wise choice...