TOUGH LOVE

Tough love is tough. It is the type of love you need to achieve success and become someone to be proud of. 

It is the type of love that makes your partner put his foot down and declare "enough is enough!" instead of watching you self-destruct. It is the type of love that says “NO” to your excesses and pulls a break before you do something fatal; it is the disciplined, principled, no-nonsense love, yes, no-nonsense!

Some people erroneously think the moment you get married; you stay perpetually on cloud nine. Your partner must never correct you, never get angry, never set boundaries and must always do whatever you want them to do whether they like it or not. No, that does not happen in a real, down to earth, 24 hours a day marriage where you have a tangible vision and goals to achieve.

Tough love is firm, assertive and disciplined. Yes, your husband should show you tenderness and compassion, yes, your wife must respect and obey you; at the same time, they must help you become a better person than when they met you. That is the real goal of marriage: to help you BECOME A BETTER PERSON and one of the ways they help you is by showing you tough love.

They correct you when you make mistakes, refuse to condone your excesses and warn you before you land into trouble. They check on you from time to time to ensure you are achieving your set goals and refuse to accept your excuses for living in mediocrity.

We shouldn't be rude, sarcastic and abusive in the name of helping our spouses. We should be mature, talk like adults, put each other’s feelings into consideration and be empathetic while helping them. 

Our goal is to help, not shatter their self-esteem to pieces which they desperately need to succeed. Wisdom is very much needed in this area.

God bless.